i believe you're going my way.

Very odd. 

The fear has left me now. 

I'm numb. I have no feeling. 

It's as if someone had pulled out some kind of a plug in me and everything—

emotion, feeling, fear—has drained out. 

And now I'm a cold shell.

tragedy

et tu, brute?

judas

a o s

you ain't play your cards right. you had the ace of clubs.
hit you with the ace of spade, in your face, and shrugged.

we was just planning the wedding. caught cagin' doves.
you were just tellin' your mans, you hate the clubs.
now we in the crying game. heart laced with slugs.

welcome to the crying game. where you lose your soul.
where it ain't no easy cash. you got to use the toll.


i couldn't breathe. and you ain't even know it.

take aim and reload

this is not the way to realize what you wanted.
it's a bit too much, too late, if i'm honest.

that heart is so cold.
all over my home.
i don't wanna know that. babe.
don't fuck with my love.

hell hath no fury

it took it all the strength i had just not to fall apart
i'm trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart
and i spent oh so many nights just feeling sorry for myself

i used to cry
but now i hold my head up high

when you try your best but you don't succeed.

when you feel so tired but you can't sleep.
stuck in reverse.
and the tears come streaming down your face.

when you lose something you can't replace.
when you love someone but it goes to waste.

could it be worse?

if you never try. you'll never know what you're worth.




it still hurts.
every day.

hi

hi.

self reflection.

stupid.

i'd rather feel pain than nothing at all.

fell on black days.

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do
I'll still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone.

You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much
Than to drown in your love and not feel your rain.

Set me free,
Leave me be.
I don't wanna fall another moment into your gravity
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be.
But you're on to me and all over me.

Oh, you loved me 'cause I'm fragile
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while
And all my fragile strength is gone.

I live here on my knees
As I try to make you see
That you're everything I think I need here on the ground.

But you're neither friend nor foe
Though I can't seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me down.

You're keeping me down, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
You're on to me, on to me, and all over...

Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long

I have never identified with lyrics, more than these.

Depressing.

insomnia part II

I guess that's what I get for drinking 2 espresso shots.
Ugh. 02:20.
Sleep, my long lost love, come back to me.

warp speed!

Moving out! Holey moley!
Got a place of my own. Who am I? This is crazy.
And Seinfeld trivia tonight in the city.
Zombie 5k in November.
Huntington Costume Bar Crawl 11/1/14.
Was I even living before?
Wow.

taylor

i think the 'peak' action time is setting in. getting sleepy. finally.
i like writing in all lower cases. looks cool.
will anyone read this? will they think i'm crazy? lol
i guess blogging is like talking to people nowadays... all input no output.

and i know its long gone.
and that magic's not here no more.
and i might be ok but i'm not fine at all.

well, maybe we got lost in translation, maybe i asked for too much,
but maybe this thing was a masterpiece 'til you tore it all up.

i'm a crumpled up piece of paper lying here
'cause i remember it all, all too well

i'd like to be my old self again, but i'm still trying to find it.

oh, taylor, your lyrics are nice. thank you.

zzzzz

100mg of benadryl. can't sleep. fuck.

don't worry that is the max 'safe' dose. geez, i'm not an idiot or anything.